LGBTQ+ Affirming Therapy in NYC

A lot of queer people get very good, very early, at reading a room. You learn what to share, what to leave out, and how to come across so nobody looks too closely. It builds real skills. It can also leave you running on a low level of alertness that never fully switches off, even with people you love.

Here you don’t have to explain the basics or manage how I’ll react. You can just talk.

What people bring in

Sometimes it’s directly about identity: coming out, exploring gender, or figuring out what you want your life to look like. Just as often it’s work stress, a relationship that keeps hitting the same wall, family that loves you in a complicated way, or anxiety that doesn’t seem to have a clear cause. You don’t need an identity-related reason to want a therapist who already gets the context.

Something I see often with gay men

Many gay men describe being the “good kid” growing up: high-achieving, easy to be around, careful not to give anyone a reason to look closer. In adulthood that can turn into perfectionism, overworking, trouble relaxing with a partner, or success that never quite feels like enough.

We look at where that came from and what it’s still protecting you from, so you can ease off without feeling like everything will fall apart.

As a gay man myself, I know how much it matters to sit across from someone who just gets it. When you don’t have to translate your life, explain your family, or brace for a reaction, you can spend your time on what you actually came in for. My hope is that you feel that ease from the first session.

How I work

Mostly through Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), with IFS and CBT mixed in. That gives us a way to make room for the part of you that stays guarded or keeps performing, instead of trying to force it to stop, and to build a life around what matters to you.

You don’t need a label, a clear goal or the right words to start. Plenty of people come in still figuring it out.

Next step

I see clients in person in New York City and online across New York, New Jersey, Washington, DC and Connecticut. Book a free 15-minute call and we’ll see if it feels right.

Related: Imposter Syndrome · Therapy for High Achievers